My 2 Cents

So, here I am, 10 days post-op bored out of my mind. I've read everything I checked out from the library, watched hours of tv on Hulu and Netflix, facebooked until my eyes burned, and browsed the news pages until I was sure the end of the world was tomorrow. Well, today I found an article worth blogging about. So, if I offend anyone, it's not my intent, it's just my opinion and I'm still on pain meds so I hope it makes sense.

I read and article today on Newsweek online about Autism and spectrum disorders and how they are on the rise. Apparently now 1 in 100 kids will have an autistic spectrum disorder. The scientists are trying to find out why, they are looking for what to blame, how to change it back, and thinking that maybe it's over-diagnosed now. So far, they know it has to do with a mutation in the genes, and then some environmental triggers to cement it all together. Oh, and lo an behold, a percentage of kids diagnosed "out-grew" the disorder. Science is crediting this to behavior therapy or re-diagnosis to other disorders. I give you this background because I have a child with Aspergers Syndrome. These kinds of reports kind of piss me off. Let me tell you why.

Several years ago, I was a horrible person. There was a child in one of my older kids' classes who had an autistic disorder, and this child's parents didn't seem to do anything about this child. And I was a horrible person. I used to think that if I had a child like that, I'd be a different parent, a better parent, etc etc. Well, then my sweet baby Haiden was born, and she was blessed with Aspergers. And I suck as a parent. Rob and I try everything with her and when we find something that works, we grab it and tell everyone it works. Eventually, it quits working and we have to start over. This is why she often runs through the neighborhood without shoes or jacket to play with her friends. She has clothes on so we have won. Back to my point. This child is brilliant. She is smart, and funny, and sweet, and stubborn, and very intelligent. I'm not saying that because I'm her mom. She scares the crap out of us because she get's it. She's bored in school because she knows it already. Do it once, and she's done. She can use a computer better than I can most the time. On the other hand, she has a difficult time with people. This is the Aspergers portion. Her social skills are lacking, impulse control, sensory integration and ability to deal with lights and sounds and crowds. She has a brilliant mind and is ready to learn, but cannot grasp the subtleties of socialization, friendships, sharing, etc. I watch her play and often have to interfere because she is strong willed and comes across as the bully.

Here is where I have issues with this Newsweek article and others like it: Who are THEY to say she isn't normal? She is unique. She learns in a different manner than those around her. She has surpassed the need to pander to social niceties and is able to speak honestly. It's not that she doesn't care, because she does care how her friends feel. Scientists and researchers say the greatest minds in our recent history probably had Autistic disorders. Who are these reporters and scientists to say that this is not a step in our evolution? These kids, no matter which end of the spectrum they are on, are brilliant and extremely intelligent. Why are we forcing them to fit an old mold of "normal" when we could be finding a new way of teaching, not just to open their minds, but the minds of those around them? The reporter in this article quoted a researcher who stated their genes were faulty. I truly find that offensive. If my child grows up to be a physicist, engineer, doctor, chef, or mother, how can they say her genes are faulty? I have seen, from my first to my last child, a range of abilities. They are each unique individuals with unique challenges and problems. Raising a child with a "disability" isn't easy. It's not easy when people look at you in the store, or family members try to tell you how to raise the kid, or how they do it better when said child spends time with them. It's not helpful when people treat them as less intelligent than they are, because articles like the one in Newsweek online label them as having faulty genes, and being a drain on resources.

I was just irritated by the article, as a parent of a child with Aspergers. These kids are intelligent and will someday be the engineers and doctors and computer geniuses of our society. But, don't tell that to the researchers, scientists, and reporters now. We need to find a "cure" so they can be normal little robots like everyone else, instead of the amazing and wonderful spirits Heavenly Father intended them to be. But, that's just my 2 cents. :)