Educational Slacker

I tend to blog late at night, and after taking my sleep meds. So, my wayward and wandering thoughts are pondered here. I hope it's at least entertaining!

I read a FB post today regarding end of year homework and how as parents, WE ARE OVER IT! I find myself doing the homework more than the kids just to get through it so they quit pestering me about being outside. I'm over the projects and reports and presentations. I'm over the concerts, and speeches, and assemblies. I'm over the field trips, and finals week freak outs. I am so DONE!

As I pondered this attitude I realized it's not just the end of the year for me. When Skylar and Jordan were little, we emphasized education. We pushed, we demanded responsibility and excellence. We expected it. We searched for the best schools, the best opportunities, and even MOVED to get it for them. We did summer reading, and Jordan won EVERY WEEK. We did soccer and baseball and ice skating and choir and softball and ballet and ballroom and violin and piano and swimming and jr. golf. We gave them EVERY educational opportunity possible. And it killed us, but it benefited them immensely! Skylar is taking dual credit college classes, has a 3.8 GPA, AP/Honors classes, student government, and will even give speeches in front of other people! He has scored well on his college entrance tests (ACT/SAT) and has many universities vying for his attention (12 at last count). He has learned to volunteer to others and work hard, as evidenced by him working 2 jobs because he wants to. The pushing paid off. Jordan, even after transferring to a public school, is excelling in honors classes, preparing to take AP/Honors classes, entering a program specifically designed for health occupations that will allow for dual credit pre-nursing and CNA certifications by graduation. She is doing test prep for her ACT/SAT tests, and expects to score well. She finds work babysitting, yardwork, housework, and uses the barter system when necessary to get what she wants. The pushing paid off. As long as they don't screw it up, they have VERY bright futures ahead of them.

So why am I so lazy with the last 2 kids? Holden and Haiden are so capable of the same academic excellence as their siblings. They are wicked smart, top of their class kids. But I'm tired. My attitude has changed. They have the same teachers Sky and J did. And yet I now see the homework as a bother and busy work. I let it slide when they choose to play before doing homework. They get out of chores because it's just faster if I or the older kids get it done. We've tried piano and cello, but it didn't stick. We did soccer and t-ball, twice. I feel like they are missing the boat. I'm just dragging them along as I focus on pushing the older kids to college. By the time I focus on the younger ones for college, it may very well be too late. I won't have taught them good work ethic with homework. Or worked with them on how to use the internet to find information appropriately. I still get nervous leaving them home alone, and yet Sky and J were responsible at this age to babysit Holden and Haiden while Rob and I went to dinner!

I suppose it may be a difference in personalities, or as I have gotten older my priorities have shifted. My views have been skewed by politics and the shift in educational standards. Or it could be that my 4 years of volunteering at the school have killed any desire to do more. Don't ask for my kid to write a 12 page thing to be made into a book. Yes it's creative and a wonderful learning tool, but I really don't have time to draw or print pictures and help format it so it prints on the correct paper to be sent to a publisher. Don't ask us to make posters and COSTUMES that go with the research paper on the book they wrote to be presented at an open house. I love it, it's a great idea, but I'm tired! And the last research project included an oral report with visual aid. Overachieving child choose to have a metal scale model steam showboat, about 2 feet long, for display for 10 minutes. I suppose it beats a poster that will get lost under the bed and thrown away in 4 months over the wails of said child who made it.

Weekly homework packets, awesome the first month of school! Suck the last month of school. Year end projects, with oral report and visual aid, consisting of 3 areas of information to be presented to the class. Overachiever child has to have a motorized display he created himself. The 4th grade assignments, I'm over it! 2 years in a row I have done them with kids. The 5th grade assignments, I'm dreading to do them with the last child, because I will have done them 2 years in a row! And since Sky and J had the next 2 teachers, I know what's coming! Pyramid projects, 2 years in a row. Shakespeare plays, 2 years in a row! Gah!

Okay, so all these assignments have merit. And I love these assignments for the creativity and learning that takes place. I love the teachers because I know they put a TON of hours into making these assignments matter and mean something. I suppose we jumped in fully with Sky and J because these assignments were new, and fun, and worthwhile. They were a neat way of exploring creativity as we worked together. And now, they have become a to-do list. Just hurry and get it done. We are busy and don't have time to get cutesy with a box. I'm truly a failing mother! I suppose I thought that if Sky and J weren't the best, that they would fail. And when they both got their first B's, I thought we were going to have to get counseling as a family to deal with the crisis. Holden and Haiden shrug it off. They will try harder next time. As long as they are doing their best, they are doing good enough. This is NOT enough! College is competitive, and expensive, and scholarships are even more competitive and who even knows what that will look like when Holden and Haiden get there. This is my stress. I don't know how to change my focus to them. The older 2 are sooooo close to achieving their goals! I can't help but drive them there. And truly, how in the world am I supposed to just drop Skylar off at college in a year and just leave him there? He needs me to make sure he eats, and navigates the campus, and joins clubs and makes friends! I suppose it's time to let the older two fly. they can succeed or fail on their own merits. We have taught them HOW to successful in their schooling. We rarely have to help them, good thing because I can't Math, and they rarely have homework. (with high GPA's)

I think it's time to introduce Holden and Haiden to their other mother, helicopter Mom. Just a small one, like a model aircraft or a drone. We will see. I'm not sure if I can focus long enough to consistently hover above, guiding, pushing, cheering, and demanding academic excellence with a focus on the future. Sigh, it is sooo exhausing.